Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. What are the three people you can never advise? Your Dark Sage Green Aesthetic Pictures images are accessible in this blog. Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. The Arsenal fan said I'm not hungry. A: Nice tattoo Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale has revealed the squad still have "scars" from the painful events of last season. Arsenal currently sit above seventh-placed Spurs in the Premier League table on goal difference, though Tottenham do have a game in hand over Mikel Arteta's men. To inquire about a licence to reproduce material, visit our Syndication site. One turns to the other and says "Hey Arthur! 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 35 Tottenham Jokes You Cannot Share With Spurs Fans. Speaking after the match, the keeper said, "The Spurs fans were giving me some [stick] throughout the second half. Southampton v Leicester City live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match, Shaun Wright-Phillips thinks dad Ian Wright regrets that his sons didnt play for Arsenal, Erling Haaland's agent drops HUGE hint over future transfer: 'Real Madrid is a dreamland', Brighton v West Ham live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match, Arsenal v Bournemouth live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match. See if this plane turns upside-down will we fall out?". What is the difference between Euro and Conte?Euro works in Europe. Go to Arsenal's store (opens in new tab). He takes one parachute and jumps.The second passenger is Elon Musk: I am the founder of SpaceX and king of the electric vehicle (EV) industry. Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. On that occasion, the fan lifted his phone in the air showing the Arsenal badge on his screen, before putting it away and sinking back into the Stamford Bridge seats. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is a Tottenham Hotspur supporter. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and, as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Q: What do you call an Arsenal fan that does well on an IQ test? She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Tottenham Hotspur supporters, too. ", The boy interrupts again: "I'm not a Rangers fan either. The Liverpool supporter said I want the liver He writes, "Spurs fan saves friend from vicious animal. (Wenger who? What do you tell your girlfriend who needs space?To check Arsenals trophy cabinet. What do Tottenham Hotspur and excellent wine have in common?They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much, and are only enjoyed on select occasions. Unleash your creativity & share you story! The primary cause of the rivalry between the two arose out of their decision to move from Woolwich to Highbury in 1913. I came up with this today at the grocery store, and I'm not a dad, so all you dads out there, here's one for your arsenal. Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for Tottenham Hotspur.' ", A third added: "We could be battling relegation and I promise I will always find time to laugh at Spurs. An encyclopedia of football shirts and boots knowledge both past and present Mark has also been to the FA Cup and League Cup finals for FFT and has written pieces for the mag ranging on subjects from Bobby Robson's season at Barcelona to Robinho's career. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. The Arsenal fan asks, "Aren't you having any?". A: The tea stays in the cup longer! Lukas Podolski Knock, knock. Q: Why do Tottenham blokes drink from a saucer? Ever since the Gunners made the move from south of the river to Islington in 1913, there's been needle between the red and white sides of north London. It said it was to weak. Q: Whats the difference between Arsenal F.C. Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? View our online Press Pack. Q: What's the difference between onions and a Tottenham supporter? 40 Lyktan 8 yr. ago Funny you say that. Taking enjoyment from the travails of rival clubs and players is football's dark matter: a constant force, essential to the very structure of the universe, but lurking murkily in the background. Q: What is the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a cup of tea? Ive let you down Ive let you down.Dont be stupid Diego, you got a draw against Spurs all by yourself. "Because I'm not an Arsenal fan." A young team lost their hope and then lost their heads and focus completely. A booming voice welcomes them as they stroll via the doorways. Had a player called David Dicks. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. It sure is hard to be an Arsenal supporter. When the police arrived they needed to examine the body so the policeman lifted the Spurs cap and looked at one breast, then he lifted the Watford cap and examined the other. A big cheer goes up as the screen shows West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham 0 He is beating Spurs all by himself!Anyway, a few more beers later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers, It must be full time now, lets see how he got on! They put the TV on. There is, however, one exception. Its God, and he says, Welcome! Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. We are nothing without our fans and this section is dedicated to our loyal supporters across the globe. Love my club. Great! "Yes" replies Lukas "you should have my details on your computer". The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. Q: What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur fan in a suit? The picture looked completely different a couple of weeks ago with Mikel Arteta's side sitting above Spurs in the Premier League table ahead of the North London . Hate Jokes Arsenal You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. ''Yes - but I couldn't get anyway near it for the Arsenal supporters! Q: Why are Tottenham strikers like grizzly bears? A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. I love it, this from the official website. Reckless Driver Those of you who have teens can tell them clean arsenal championship dad jokes. He would swerve his van as if to hit them, then swerve back just missing them. Then he hands the bottle to the Arsenal fan. Funny Arsenal Jokes Arsenal's 100% win record start to the EPL season 2022-23 was finally ended after six games, and fans are speculating about a similar pattern in previous seasons post-Wenger era. Never too bad. All the while, a newspaper reporter who was taking a stroll through the park is watching. BA1 1UA. The teacher is now angry. Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito?A mosquito stops sucking. Whatever the reason for Tottenham's collapse, it gave Arsenal fans a rare excuse to self-combust in laughter and waved them off for the summer by gifting them the most enjoyable moment of the 2015-16 campaign. Here is an unforgettable collection of Arsenal jokes and banter, from their Champions League run to the mocking from nearby clubs like Liverpool and Tottenham. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and hit that Arsenal bastard again, harder. It said it was to weak. Great! Click on the basket icon in the top right and if you don't have anything in there, the site will tell you that your basket is "as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet". (Whos there?)Gunner. it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks. 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. Plus tips on how to play better and interviews with the biggest names. Thinking quickly, his friend rips a plank of wood from a fence, forces it into the dog's collar and twists it, breaking the dog's neck. 4. The Gunners have discovered their Europa League fate after being . Explore the lighter side of being an Arsenal fan! And she got very depressed. But, as usual, he swerved back onto the road just in time. Im an influence. Ive only had him for like 20 months.. club doctors confirm. A: Nice tattoo All of the sudden Tom Thumb says, "You know, how do I know I'm the world's smallest man? Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. 1) I don't get religion, believing in someone that did great things thousands of years ago in the hope they may do it again A bit like. A: The baby will stop whining after awhile. "That's no reason," she says loudly. Required fields are marked *. What should you do? He takes another one and jumps.The third passenger was Mikel Arteta: I am the Manager of Arsenal FC and I am one of the most creative, most intelligent, and well-remembered football players. Whilst the away end was bouncing, one Arsenal fan was hiding in plain sight behind enemy lines, and went viral for showing off his Arsenal kit in the home end, without the steward noticing, as you can see in the video below. A: So blind people could laugh at them too! A tourist is in North London one Saturday and he decides he would very much like to go to a football match, so he asks a man in the street if there are any local matches being played that afternoon. Q: What does a Gunners fan do when his team has won the Champions League? NuzzlesK 8 yr. ago See the top comment. The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. Q: What's the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Arsenal tickets? For further details of our complaints policy and to make a complaint please click this link: thesun.co.uk/editorial-complaints/, Tottenham were trolled by Arsenal for their lack of trophies on the Gunners' online store, Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO). to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. "So you're an Arsenal fan, that's interesting. The jibe is common between the two sets of fans. "A Pedophile?" Three aged soccer fans enter a church. A: A wind tunnel. Johnny comes to the front of the class. Arsenal might be top of the Premier League by five points, and clear of local rivals Tottenham Hotspur by 11 points, but one fan still thinks the Spurs players are better. A: Dress her in a Manchester United jersey! A: Every fall they go into hibernation. A: People would pass up a pair of Arsenal tickets. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. replies Arsene. "Arsenal Story JokesTwo Gunners fans are on the plane on the way to Holland. Whats up? He asks. ', Megan Fox was thinking: 'That Arsenal fan must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Spurs fan and got slapped for it.'. Whether it's a Windows, Mac, iOS or Android operating system, you will still be able to bookmark this site. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Suddenly, the driver saw a Tottenham supporter walking down the road, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Why should Spurs have some talks with Theresa May?They got out of Europe within 2 months. A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points. Have you all heard about the new Arsenal Bra?It has a whole lot of support but it doesnt have any cups. "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions. This Arsenal team is demonstrating dominance and superiority over their opponents. A: Because Tottenham supporters have started to make them up themselves. ", boasts the little girl. A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points. Each supports a different team, one for Hartlepool, one for Liverpool, and one for Arsenal. Why did he say that when the result was announced that Tottenham lost?Because hes a Spurs supporter. asks Lukas . A former Arsenal academy star, Bennacer has the chance to gain some favourable points with his ex-north London side with a big performance against Tottenham in the Champions League, and. ""The cups man! Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, symbol, blackandwhite, pix, etc. "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Tottenham Hotspur supporter." The Sun website is regulated by the Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO), Our journalists strive for accuracy but on occasion we make mistakes. A subscription makes a thoughtful gift for both family and friends. ", So the reporter starts again: "Gooner git kills family pet". He phoned her up and said "what the fuck's going on? Since 1961:Man has walked on the moon.England has won a World Cup.The Berlin Wall was put up.The Berlin Wall was pulled down.Color television has been invented.Internet has been invented.Lots of people have Netflix and chilled.People have started paying in Cryptocurrency.But Spurs still havent won the league. Spurs supporters were left annoyed over the message, as they insisted that it was an unnecessary cheap shot. What is the difference between Arsenals players going to Chelsea and Chelseas players going to Arsenal?One goes to retire while the other goes to win trophies. Why do ducks fly over White Hart Lane upside down? "I'm going to give Mass at St. Francis church, about two miles down the road," replied the priest. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. Arsenal have won 13 titles to Tottenham's two - the last of which was lifted in 1961. Post your Arsenal banter in the comment section below. Arsenal are no strangers when it comes to mocking local rivals Tottenham. Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and an Arsenal striker? Q: Why are Arsenal strikers like grizzly bears? A: Intelligent Arsenal supporters. Q: What does an Arsenal supporter and a bottle of beer have in common? A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. Q: Who delivers Arsenals Christmas presents? He takes off his clothes for other men, and if they pay him enough money, he goes into the alley and performs sexual acts on them.' To receive credit as the author, enter your information below. You will receive a verification email shortly. After Tom Thumb's conference, he came out smiling and said, "It's all right, I am the world's smallest man". Have a funny joke on Arsenal? A: I cry when I cut up onions They come across a dead camel and are having trouble deciding who gets what? A: They can't string three "Ws" together. Career Day "Arsenal Story JokesA woman buys a car in London. I set my XBOX password to "Arsenal Defense". Whats the problem with Martin degaard?Odegaard wouldnt shoot Hitler if he had a gun. Primary He takes one and jumps.The fourth passenger was the Pope. The former Arsenal striker appeared to mock Tottenham during a punditry appearance on French television. 'The season's almost over!'. A: Because the cup's always in Manchester! Q: What is the difference between a Tottenham supporter and a baby? The Rivalry of Tottenham Hotspur - Arsenal. What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Spurs strikers?Clinton can score. Twice. "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", Why are Tottenham jokes getting dumber by the day? A pause, and a smile. A: Because the cup's always in Manchester! It will be interesting to see what happens when he leaves the house. They enter the weekend occupying the last of the Champions League qualifying places after 25 . He thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?" He rushes over, introduces himself and takes out his pad and pencil to start his story for the next edition. You can explore arsenal fifa reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. FC Arsenal Funny Jokes How many Arsenal fans does it take to change a lightbulb?None. He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. There was a problem. Martin Odegaard's long range shot nine minutes before halftime pretty much ended the match as a contest, even if Spurs did improve in the second half. "Thats what happened and its a shame as its just a game of football at the end of the day. Emmanuel Adebayor Q: What is the difference between an Arsenal supporter and a baby? The Arsenal supporter prays to God, When will Arsenal win the Premier League again? , to which God replies, In 20 years. The admirer, like the first, is visibly upset, saying, Thats a shame, Ill probably be dead by then.God then turns his attention to the last man, asking, And what of you, my son? What exactly is your question? He takes them before anyone notices.Nails always come in handy. "can I have a Big Mac! Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. ?A Space Invader.Jokes About ArsenalHow long has Tony Adams played for Arsenal?Donkeys years.Arsenal Football Club JokesHow many Arsenal players does it take to change a light bulb?Eleven - one to change it and ten to play the offside trap.Jokes About ArsenalHeard the one about David Seaman?He never keeps a clean sheet.Arsenal FC JokesWhen Gazza scored at Wembley, Seaman was all over the place.Arsenal FC JokesWhat's the difference between Paul Merson and the rest of the Arsenal team?One takes dope and the rest are dopes.Jokes About ArsenalWhat have Paul Merson and a can of Coca Cola got in common?Their both red and white and full of coke.Jokes ArsenalWhy is the pitch at Highbury so green?Because they keep putting lots of shit on it.Arsenal jokesHow come Arsenal fans don't fall asleep during a match?The smell of their ground keeps them awake.Arsenal JokesWhat's the highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Pro-plus (sleep repellant).Best Arsenal JokesWhat's the second highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Horlicks.Best Jokes About ArsenalWhat is the difference between Paul Merson and a former Arsenal player, surname George?One Charlie shoots, the other shoots Charlie.Arsenal JokesWhat is the difference between Jon Pertwee and Ray Parlour?Ray Parlour still looks like Worzel Gummidge.Arsenal FC JokesAt Highbury, what is the difference between the words 'disciplinary' and 'football'? Turn off the PlayStation. Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? Washington should change their name to "Senators," and Cleveland could become the "Steamers.". Be realistic.Arsenal fan: Okay. A: Shoot the Arsenal Fan. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Last season, during a match against Reading , Gunners supporters chanted non-stop for Rocastle for the first 10 minutes of the fixture . replied her husband. There are also arsenal puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. 'Look at this, dear. Snow White left God's chamber smiling also, "It's ok," she said, "I am the fairest of them all". When the train came out of the tunnel, Megan Fox and the Spurs fan were sitting as if nothing had happened while the Gunners fan had his hand against his face as if he had been hit hard. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. Like the massive whopper that he is, Richard Keys somehow managed to blame the incident on Mikel Arteta's actions on the touchline. We Have got 7 picture about Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans images, photos, pictures, backgrounds, and more. A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. When will Manchester United win the Premier League again? Which team always starts the match with a bang?The Gunners! He once saw Tyrone Mings at a petrol station in Bournemouth but felt far too short to ask for a photo. the second one wore supported Manchester United and wore red knickers, Finally, things might be starting to turn our way! A: Ask an Arsenal supporter! Please note that all fields followed by an asterisk must be filled in. Q: Why don't they drink tea at Emirates Stadium? "Why do I need help?" It only receives one station! The player from Liverpool goes, well in that case I'll eat the LIVER. Arsenal's highlight of an otherwise intermittently miserable season arrived on the final round of fixtures as they somehow secured their best Premier League finish in 11 years, just weeks after discontent aimed at manager Arsene Wenger and owner Stan Kroenke spilled over into planned protest in a home game against Norwich City. That was the case on Sunday as well, as one Spurs fan kicked Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale at the end of the match, as the England player collected his things. "Let's hear the good news," the president replied. 'Of course I wouldn't!' "Arsenal Story JokesTwo men are fishing on a river bank in a remote area of the River Thames on a Saturday afternoon miles away from any radio or tv.Suddenly one man turns to the other and says "The Gunners have lost again. We know its important but its only Spurs. not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. "Why do I need help?" But always above Spurs. What does an Arsenal fan do when he sees a blue bird flying?Shoots it and then gives it to a Spurs Fan. A booming voice welcomes them as they walk through the doors. The jibe is common between the two sets of fans. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his hands. On her way home she notices that only one radio station works. But even though there's plenty of animosity between the two clubs, it doesn't often spill over into the official spokespeople, channels or accounts of either team openly mocking one another. FourFourTwo is part of Future plc, an international media group and leading digital publisher. This site is an open community for users to share their favorite pics on the internet, all images or pictures in this website are for personal pix use only, it is stricly prohibited to use this images for commercial purposes, if you are the writer and find this images is shared without your permission, please kindly raise a DMCA report to Us. Q: Why did God make Arsenal supporters smelly? The policeman said to himself I cant let his family see him like this, so before calling them, he took the Spurs shirt off. the other one wore no knickers and she supported Arsenal. What two Tottenham players make a Liverpool goalie?Alli-Son Becker. I want Arsenal to win the Champions League.Santa: So what color of the dragon are we talking about here? Meanwhile, a Manchester United star faces a snub from . What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. What's the bad the news?" Q: What do you call an Tottenham Hotspur fan that does well on an IQ test? This service is provided on News Group Newspapers' Limited's Standard Terms and Conditions in accordance with our Privacy & Cookie Policy. You wouldn't do a thing like that,-would you?' Laughing at Tottenham will sustain a lot of supporters during the summer, but asking Spurs to accept their place in football's grand design quietly invites Arsenal to do likewise. Our website always gives you hints for seeing the highest quality pics content, please kindly hunt and locate more enlightening articles and pix that fit your interests. An Arsenal fan has gone viral, after following in the footsteps of his fellow fan, by hiding in the home end during the north London derby. Tottenham, however, have had the recent bragging rights over their north London neighbours. What is the difference between Tottenham and a book?A book has a title. There were three football fans one each from the clubs Arsenal, Manchester City and Liverpool they were walking in the desert and found a dead camel. Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? Q: What's the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and Tottenham Hotspur? Why dont they drink tea at White Hart Lane?Because all the cups are in Manchester.